hot mess express right here

May 1, 2020

First, I’ve turned into my mother. I actually washed a cool whip container yesterday. Today, Ben picked it up with food inside and didn’t complain one little bit. That’s probably because he returned 3 containers from a previous hot meal I prepared.

In news equally as depressing, the US recently purchased 100,000 more body bags. If turning into your Mom is a 3… anticipating the need of 100k body bags is a 10.

Indiana’s Governor said today there will be a 5-step reopening plan put into place. He says we’ll be 100% open on the 4th of July. Having said that, I’m surprised that 10 Indiana malls are set to open tomorrow — especially with Marion County numbers looking awful already. They claim they’ll have CDC-approved masks and sanitizing packets available for shoppers… two things unavailable to lowly online shoppers, like me.

All this RONA talk is making Merida crazy!

Rona's made Merida crazy!

It also caused her to eat 2 small jars of Vaseline — given to me by my dermatologist after a procedure. Merida isn’t picky when it comes to greasy stuff. From butter to Vaseline… she loves it all just the same.

Vasoline – 0 : Merida – 2

Quick stats as of 3:30 PM ET 5/1/2020 (day #56 of isolation for me)
157 cases in Jackson County (up 19 since yesterday)
18,630 cases in Indiana (up 815 since yesterday)
1,062 Deaths in Indiana (new 55)
1,091,038 cases in America (up 45,016 since yesterday)

TIL (today I learned): Men walk significantly slower when walking with a woman, but only when that woman is their romantic partner. If she’s a friend or acquaintance they go at almost full speed. Click to read more…